3/3/26 - Mourning, hope, and rest

Good afternoon ...

Today's three articles don't have much in common. And that's okay!

How One Organization is Honoring Our Disabled Dead

John Loeppky, Disabled Journalists Association - February 27, 2026

"Disability Day of Mourning honors the victims of filicide—in this case where a family or household member kills a disabled person. Vigils are held internationally, including online, and ASAN hosts a site, disability-memorial.org, that highlights the stories of those murdered and an anti-filicide toolkit. From the site, you can download a list, each year featuring a call for coordinators to host events in their area.  The list has grown to such a point that the goal each year is to name each person who died in the previous year at least once."

It can be hard to explain to a general audience the value and positive emotional power of the Autistic Self Advocacy Network's annual Disability Day of Mourning, An event remembering disabled people murdered by members of their own families is hard to talk about with people who are more accustomed to stories celebrating brave, plucky disabled people and their caring, inspirational families. But the darkness of it is the point. While the problem isn't quite an epidemic, it's a lot more common that most people think – including probably most disabled people. Worse, perceptions of these deaths are still influenced by an all too common reflexive sympathy a lot of people have for the perpetrators. Thinking of them as something other than murderers is part of how we rationalize it. The idea of "mercy killing" is still quite alive in common parlance. And people who can't sympathize with the killers often still want to look away from them and blame "the system," or the victims' disabilities themselves. Plus, more states, provinces, and countries than ever have created legal channels for "assisted suicide," which to me seems like a first cousin to family murder. None of this feels uplifting in any conventional sense. But remembering and naming those disabled people killed in this way is important, and does our disability communities good.

There’s a silver lining to our health care cost crisis

Dylan Scott, Vox.com - February 24, 2026

"Despite lawmakers’ ongoing impasse, the conditions are actually ripening for another serious attempt to improve the American health care system. Here’s the case for a little optimism on the eve of yet another health care policy failure."

This is another of those rare occasions when I share an article that isn't about disability and doesn't even mention it, but probably belongs here. Whatever comes next in health care reform in the US will need disabled people's involvement at every step. Being in favor of universal coverage is a start – or for any step that takes individual affordability out of the equation. But health care reform almost always includes some ideas for "cost containment," and that can be risky for disabled and chronically ill people. This may be especially so in the current MAHA/wellness culture, where we are all held solely responsible for our own health, and the very idea of public health is being thrown out the window. I want to be hopeful about real health care reform in the US. But if it looks like it might happen in any form, we have to be vigilant – and yes, a little selfish.

Disabled people should be allowed to choose ease

Lucy Webster, The View From Down Here - February 17, 2026

"All my life, people have praised me for being resilient. I used to resent this because I didn’t think I was. I was chronically anxious. I cried a lot. I felt like I was failing all the time. I now see that, actually, I was resilient. I showed up and did things despite the anxiety and the crying, and, more saliently, despite the ableism and exclusion and physical pain I was braced for ... But you know what? I still resent being praised for it. Not least because, instead of being good at rolling with the punches, I would quite like the punches to, well, stop."

The last line of this selected quote is brilliant. It perfectly describes one of the most common experiences of having disabilities – being praised for our toughness and, instead of taking pleasure in that, wishing we didn't have to be so damned tough all the time. What more is there to say? I would love to hear from readers on their experiences and thoughts about this. Email comments to: apulrang@icloud.com.

Disability Thinking Weekday is a Monday-Friday newsletter with links and commentary on disability-related articles and other content. You can help promote Disability Thinking Weekday by forwarding it by email or posting on your social media. You can also comment by sending me an email at: apulrang@icloud.com. Collected comments are shared on the first of each month. A free subscription sends a newsletter to your email each weekday. Benefits of paid subscription include:

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